friendship

Written Tuesday, February 12, 2013

I know its been about a month since I’ve posted a blog, sorry about that. I just haven’t had internet access aside from on my phone. Hopefully I will have procured a modem by the end of this week, which will allow me to post blogs and even Skype! Stay tuned.

So today’s post is going to be about a few topics that have been swirling about in my mind the past few days. The first, is friendship. Because of my integration in to the community, the time I spend with my neighbors, doing community activities, and with my organizations I like to think that I am very well integrated into my town. Obviously I am still the white girl who has a dog and lives alone (which defies so many cultural norms in itself) but I hear more calls of “amiga” (friend) or “mana” (sister) than I do “mulungu” (white person). So yes, I am integrated, people know me, and I them – but that brings me to the word of the week: friendship.

“If you are brave enough to say goodbye, life will reward you with a new hello” – Paulo Coehlo

It is hard some days to know that all I will talk about (in Portuguese) is sickness/disease, food, or the weather. I miss having both deep intellectual conversations with family and friends over dinner and chatty gossip with a girlfriend over a chai tea latte in a coffee shop. It is an interesting experience, to be surrounded by my local friends here in Mozambique chatting about what we are each making for dinner, and yet feeling so alone because there are so many other things I want to talk about but really cant.

I have tried to broach the subjects of politics, religion, other countries/cultures, but it ends up being a one-sided conversation with the other party losing interest or my information falling on deaf ears. I cant talk about how much I miss going down to the Strip District in Pittsburgh for a biscotti and coffee on a Saturday morning. I cant really relate to my good (and probably closest) friend/neighbor Thelma very much, although we are the same age. She has two children, Daisy, 7 and Wilma age 3. I enjoy her company more than I can say, she is a wonderful person who I can laugh with, and sit under a tree with for hours. But our conversation always revolves around children, marriage, why I am not married/don’t have a boyfriend, and why I don’t have children. Sometimes she will break off from these questions and talk about a telanovella (tv show) she watched last night, asking if my life was anything like it. I also answer many questions she has about my life in the states. I do my best to answer in full and complete detail, but truthfully she has no point of reference or anything to compare my stories of skyscrapers and houses to, having never left Quissico. So when that happens, she usually pauses for a bit, we sit in silence, and then return to talking about babies. Ahh . . . full circle.

So when I say that I appreciate emails, facebook posts, and packages from home, please know that I really mean it. Reminding me that people care, and that I’m not being forgotten is a really nice thing to know. Obviously lives are going to move forward and people will change while I am gone, my life will do the same here, but an update about these changes is really appreciated. So with all of that said I’ll say thank you to those who have made the effort to remain in contact, it really means a lot.

This past weekend I remained here at site, Friday working till around noon, and hanging out with the neighbors in the afternoon/evening. Saturday I literally did not leave my house/yard all day – it was glorious. I took an entire day to do things around the house, nap, cook and watch movies. I didn’t even bother to put pants on because I knew I wasn’t leaving my fenced-in yard. It was relaxation at its finest.

Sunday I went to church with the neighbors, it was the one year anniversary of the Pastor’s service to the church, so there was a lot of singing, celebrating and smiles. Mind you the service itself lasted 4 hours and was in local dialect, so I didn’t understand anything and was bored out of my wits. But afterwards there was a great lunch of traditional food and conversation. It got me face time with friends and members of the community, and kept me in the good graces of the neighbors. In the afternoon I went down for my English Group meeting, to find that one person showed up. . . I was a bit disappointed, not going to lie, but decided to have the meeting anyway. So Raymond and I had about an hour long broken conversation in Porto-Glish, a mixture of Portuguese and English. It was during this session that it hit me. . . it doesn’t matter if I teach 20 people to speak English, if I can get this boy speaking correctly by the end of my two years, I will have made that bit of difference, that bit of good, that I wanted to do. Being bilingual with English in this country opens up so many doors for people. Scholarships become available, jobs in bigger cities etc. Raymond is a hard worker in the carpentry with my organization Despertai, he also studies very hard in secondary school, and is determined to learn English and make something of himself. I want to help him in any way possible.

Work yesterday frustrated me to no end. I was at the hospital helping out in the reception area (or in my mind- the land of lost paperwork, disorganization and dysfunction) registering people for their ARV medication. As usual the hospital was PACKED because it was a Monday, one day I will try to take a picture of the place on a Monday, words cant describe just how insane it can get there. – and yet, because all of the women are wearing different capulana’s (colorful fabric) it is a thing of beauty, all at the same time.  Sigh – the dichotomy of this country.

I have decided that the only way I will be able to get through my work with/within the hospital will be to navigate the politics and disorganization. That is, after all, what this experience is all about – experiencing a totally different culture.

I hate hospitals in the states with a passion, mainly because I spent so much time in them as a child with my countless injuries. . but working in the one here, although it is a brand new structure less than two years old, makes me long for the structure, and organization of hospitals in the states. Sigh. See you in August 2014 haha.

Which brings me to my last point – its already mid-February?? When did that happen?

Happy Valentines Day everyone, go eat some chocolate.

t